Unfamiliar Expressions

My little family went out for dinner tonight. On the way home, my husband was complaining about an obnoxious pimple.

Daddy: It just won't go away.

Flik: Why don't you pop it.

(Aside: Clearly we've got some stellar parenting going on here that my 5 year old is advising his dad on popping pimples. But anyway...)

Daddy: I did. But it's one of those pimples that just keeps coming back. It's like a cat; it's got nine lives.

Flik: Um, If you shoot a cat, it's dead.

So at least my kid has a firm understanding of cat mortality.

Man with a Plan

Yesterday as I pulled into the garage, Flik asked me, "Can we play pretend?"

"Sure," I responded.

And as he hopped out of his carseat, he continued with...

"And don't go in that door, go to the front door. But wait until I go inside first. And then go to the front door and ring the doorbell. And I'll come to the door and I'll open the door and I'll say, 'Who are you?' And you say your name. And I'll invite you in. And then you can come inside, but you have to pretend like I don't know you. Ok?"

It's probably only a matter of time before he starts handing out printed scripts.

Just Bragging

So sometimes a mom just wants to brag. And why else have a blog about my kids if not to brag about them. Today, I'll brag about Flik.

Today I took Flik mini-golfing. It was a beautiful day, school will soon be starting again, and I just wanted to spend some time alone with him. Apparently, everyone in the western suburbs of Chicago had the same idea, because the place was packed. But since that doesn't really matter much to a 5 1/2 year old, we decided to brave the crowds.

We got our balls and our clubs and took our place at the end of the line of people queued up at the first hole. There were about 5 groups of people in front of us when we arrived, so we had a bit of a wait. To pass the time, Flik decided to read aloud the large sign posted with the "Rules of Play."

1. No more than five players in any group.
2. All players tee off before stroking second putts.
3. Ball may be moved 6 inches from sides or obstacles without penalty.
4. If Ball leaves playing area, place at point of departure. Penalty - one stroke.
5. Stroke limit 6 per hole.

I gotta' tell you. I know my kid's reading abilities are good, but I often forget. He hates when I buy him new books that I expect him to read himself. He always wants me to read them to him. And he told me the other day that when he grows up, he wants a job that has "no reading in it!" And sometimes I wonder how much of his awesome reading is him remembering stories, just looking at the pictures to figure out what the hard words are, or just plain guessing at words he doesn't know based on context and getting them right. (These are also all useful skills, so props to him for doing those as well.) But today, he read every word on that sign without batting an eye. No pictures. No previous exposure.

Obstacles. Penalty. Departure.

Damn, he even impressed me. You go kid!

The Ants Visit California

We have been home from our California vacation for a week now. We spent three and a half days in Sonoma and three and a half in San Francisco. It was a wonderful vacation. If you haven't tired of my Instagrams, here are some more photos from our trip.

They Need a Real Baby

Flik is just staring to get the concept of "actors" playing "roles" in movies. This was prompted by the realization that Han Solo is also Indiana Jones. (Letting Flik watch Indiana Jones proved to be a little too much action/adventure for this Mommy, so now we're going to go on a puppy & kitten movie marathon for the next few weeks, but I digress.)

Anyway, we were in the car and Flik says, "So they needed a real baby for Harry Potter?"

Using my Super Mommy ability to deduce what that incomplete thought must mean, I realized he was asking about the baby in the movie.

Mommy: Yes, Dear. There was a real baby in the movie. 

Flik: So they had to make the baby sleep and stuff? 

Mommy: Well, no. When you need a baby to sleep in a movie, you pretty much wait until the baby goes to sleep on his own and then you shoot the baby sleeping.

... silence ...

Flik: You shoot the baby?

Yikes! Imagine now five minutes of Mommy backpedaling trying to explain how you shoot pictures and shoot movies and hoping I haven't scarred my child by having had him just envision people shooting baby Harry Potter to make the movie.

He seems fine. But if he ends up in therapy, I'm sure he'll just print out this blog post and bring it with him.

Story Sticks: The Bored Wizard

This past weekend, we made Saturday a project day. One of our projects was to create story sticks. I posted the process on the other blog: Story Sticks. The end result of the project was that Flik had to create a story with the following parameters:

• character: wizard
• conflict: bored
• setting: school
• "special item": cookies

Here was Flik's story:

Once upon a time, there was a wizard and he was four. And he was bored at his school. So he asked his teacher if they could make cookies, but his teacher said, "No."

So he was still bored. He tried to escape from the school, but he couldn't because the windows were locked. He tried to take the key from the wall hanging from the hook to unlock the windows. But it was so far up because there was this tall person who unlocks the windows. And that tall person was the only person who could reach the keys.

So he tried to steal the school's axe, but the axe was hanging from a rope up on the ceiling because the same tall person had to get it.

Then he takes his hands and breaks the lowest window. He jumps out the window and runs away so that the teachers won't catch him.

Then a policeman saw him. But the wizard was so fast (crazy fast), he went all around the world until ran until he ran into the same policeman again. And the policeman caught him and brought him to the jail.

The End.

Flik Reads a Bedtime Story

The other night, I sat down to read Z a story before bedtime. Flik jumped on my lap and wanted to read the story instead. I brilliantly remembered to record the event. Here is the four minute presentation.

A few notes about the video:

1. I was holding my cellphone so that the kids could see themselves as it was being filmed. Hence their obsession with looking directly at the camera. Really, they're looking at themselves.

2. Since they kept squirming around, _I_ kept looking at the camera to try to get them both to stay in the shot.

Enjoy.